Public Displays of Racism & White Privilege

Recently I witnessed possible discrimination happening between two different customers at a restaurant. The person alleging discrimination was Black. What bothered me most was how the hostess apologized to the White couple after she left and then proceeded to apologize to me after I questioned her about what had happened. Our waitress did the same. This woman couldn’t defend herself now that she had left. I asked our server and the hostess if she felt that she was being discriminated against and they confirmed this but denied that any discrimination happened, “Oh that’s not what was going on. I don’t know why she thought that.”

Here’s some truth for you: it probably was happening. I saw that White couple, I saw how they were looking at her. Both the server and the hostess were White. The complaining customer was Black. We’re in Portland It’s quite damn possible that she was being discriminated against.

About a month later I went back to this venue and again noticed that with the same hostess, there were two different couples with Black members and they had been sat in the back, away from the windows or by the kitchen entrance. There were many other seating options closer to other customers that were noticeably unoccupied. This really made me consider the incident I witnessed before and whether or not I was going to patronize this establishment. I once was a friend with a person who worked for that restaurant and he had some decidedly racist and classist things to say when complaining about customers. In this environment I am sadly unsurprised racism could be going down.

The waitress and hostess’ incredulity about what took place is familiar to me. I find that White folks balk at the mention of racism and rush to defend themselves or a situation away from it. I even have friends who will do this. They are quick to try to explain away the person’s actions. My own partner is guilty of it. It’s very frustrating for us to be told that our experience is somehow blind or incorrect.

So what I took away from this, as a Latino, as a person of color, is that I really need White people, (and especially my White friends) to consider that racism does happen to us whether or not they witness or perceive it. That’s one of the “joys” of White privilege; you don’t have to experience racism. So please stow your apologies and explanations.

Community Alert: Hate Crime in Downtown Portland Last Night

On August 6th around 9-10pm a Latina woman was assaulted by a group of White men after she refused to acknowledge their initial harassment of her. They punched her and also threw garbage including beer bottles at her. The crime occurred on Stark and 13th Avenue in downtown Portland, OR. If you can identify any of the people in the photos or have any other information about this crime please contact the Portland police's non-emergency line @ 503-823-3333.

United States of What?

Both of my parents came from working class backgrounds and rose out of their class level. They taught my sister and I the value of hard work, community involvement but also to be critical of the status quo.

It is through those lenses that I developed into an adult, and when I discovered that the American dream was a lie, I admit it stung. But I took my existential anger and channelled it into advocating marginalized people and deconstructing the interlocking systems of oppression that keep the great White capitalist hope grinding the rest of us into oblivion.

Today however, I woke up exhausted. The news lately has been nothing but awful. The government is spying on us through organizations that are supposed to protect us, there are still wars raging in Afghanistan and Iraq (and one soon to come in Syria I fear), the Supreme Court just crippled the Voting Rights Act, and freedom of the press is slowly eroding away with the criminalization of whistle-blowers. I don't recognize my country anymore.

I am angry. I am angry that I feel like I have to be careful what I publish, that I still don't have health insurance, I am angry that anti-Semitism is on the rise, that mixed-race families in my city are getting swastikas spray pained on their property, I am angry that I could get fired if my boss found out I am queer. I am angry that I voted to re-elect Obama and he has betrayed us.
I don't feel safe here.

Community Alert: White Supremacist Literature Found in Milwaukee Neighborhood

KATU News broke this story earlier this week when a Milwaukee resident found these racist fliers left on cars along SE International Way. The pamphlets are mostly in Spanish and probably being used to target Latino immigrants for intimidation. They lead back to a White supremacist group. The Milwaukee woman who found them, Dinah Davis, told reporters she was horrified and that she wants the group to know they're not welcome in her neighborhood.

Please be aware and stay safe. Report and White supremacist activities to your local law enforcement officials, the media and Rose City Antifa.

Workplace Microaggressions & PTSD

I was excited to start a new job in a well-paid position. It was in the field I enjoy most working in (mental health) and worked not only with private insurance but also our state's low income program OHP. I was really enjoying the atmosphere of the office but then I started noticing things that made me feel really uncomfortable.

During my training, one of the staff members told us a story about how she was alone on a street and there was a Black man walking towards her and how "Sorry to say, but I was scared". The trainer kind of made fun of her for it which was a nice way to defuse the situation. The folks at the training were all pretty cool despite that and never made weird comments about race or sexuality. They also warned me about my future office manager.

Once working my office manager asked me some inappropriate questions about my sexuality based on stereotyping my clothing choices. She also asked me about my religious beliefs which is also inappropriate (and illegal) when she invaded my desk space and noticed a keychain with a khamsa on it. On top of that, this same person made rude comments about "Mexicans" and how she was frustrated by their accents. This came up a few times. My coworker knew about my biracial background and corrected her but to no avail. You really can't win when people think they've got a right to say something. What was ultimately distressing was many people in the office's unwillingness to help people with thick accents. I know that phones can make hearing people more difficult, but it is no excuse to not help a person get the care they need because you have a more difficult time understanding them. Chances are they are having issues understanding you too. This is especially problematic for people seeking mental health care.

Not only did these situations arise, but the manager created an unsafe atmosphere for us to work with her negativity and her emotional dumping. I ultimately ended up quitting after two weeks. I told the supervisor during the exit interview about all of this and how I felt I could not work under those conditions. She surprised me by informing me that complaints had been made against that manager before. What doesn't surprise me is that she is still with the company.

New studies have shown that micro-aggressions (homophobia, misogyny, racism etc) can lead to PTSD in the long term. This is something I want to investigate in my research on therapy and PTSD. I have encountered ignorance before in the social work/mental health fields but nothing this blatantly illegal or negative. Have you had similar experiences?

Cultural Diversity & Portland's White Heterosexual Middle Class Monoculture: An Open Letter to Meg Descamp

Dear Meg, I recently received a copy of my alma mater's alumni news magazine and your article "Is Portland really Portlandia?" angered me. I am frustrated especially in light of the recent Blackface incident in North Portland. You detailed a "cultural diversity" here in our city that I don't agree with. You wrote, They [the young professionals] are committed to Portland and to all the city has to offer: cultural diversity, natural beauty, and a progressive political and social climate.The irony-cum-hypocrisy was especially poignant with the photo of all the lily-white faces at Ms. Tunstall's sewing factory. Seriously?

Please explain to me how a city that is 76% White is culturally diverse. A city where Mars Hill Church, an unabashedly homophobic and sexist religious organization set up shop in what was once a hippy heartland (the Hawthorne neighborhood). How is a city progressive when it can't solve its issues with homelessness, rampant gentrification and when the police force has admitted that it racially profiles? How can a city call itself "liberal" when it consistently votes against police accountability and statutes to assist the homeless?

The "cultural diversity" buzz phrase really angers me the most. Portland is home to a large DIY, sustainable/green, crafty organic type of culture, but it is still a monoculture practiced by mostly White upwardly mobile Middle Class heterosexuals who want to dye themselves as unique and progressive. It's still just a monoculture.

How does that qualify as diverse? That is not diversity. Bike lanes, pop-up shops and organic grocery stores are not diversity. This is especially true when they are here to serve the monoculture. To call Portland diverse insults the experience of the poor, the people of color and the queer folks who have to somehow exist within the phobic, classist and Whitewashed culture that Portland has created.

Please stop ignoring us.

Sincerely,
A community member.

Microaggressions at the Grocery Store

Hello World, Happy Chanukkah! Although it is a fun time, it’s always this time of year that I’ve got to have the inevitable awkward conversations with clients, colleagues and total strangers that I don’t in fact celebrate Christmas but that I celebrate the festival of lights, Chanukkah. I don’t usually find this notable and I just file it away in my cognitive box of unimportance. Last Friday however, I felt the need to write about my experience at the grocery.

Last Friday was the day before Chanukkah and of course I was running late on everything due to exams and commuting back and forth from the city. I rushed over to Safeway in the evening in an attempt to procure some candles for my hanukkiya. I couldn’t find the kosher section, which was unusual; normally it is in the pan-ethnic section of Safeway. I managed to catch the attention of an employee in the produce aisle.

He didn’t know where the kosher section was, and took me over to another employee in the meat section who “knew where everything was”. This gentleman then took us to the kosher section which had inexplicably moved to the soup and beans aisle (!!!), all the while talking about how all the kosher food had to have it’s own shelf and be separated from other food (as I understand it this is not a requirement of Kashrut in non-Jewish grocery stores, it can sit on the shelf next to other items so I didn’t like the implications).  He kept states this to his co-worker and me multiple times and how interesting he thought it was. I was starting to get uncomfortable and pressured for some reason. The section didn’t have what I was looking for and the employee voiced how he couldn’t remember where the Chanukkah items were. He then wished me a happy Chanukkah and they both went back to their departments.

I gave up and looked around the store a few minutes longer trying to find a spot featuring some Chanukkah stuff: gelt, candles, kitschy wrapping paper even. Yet there was nothing! There was an entire AISLE dedicated to Christmas items yet not a single magen david or chocolate coin to be found for me and the other yehudit. I admit I was frustrated at that point and still a little perturbed by my previous interaction. I left.

Upon later reflection I realized I felt unsafe identifying myself as Jewish to two strangers in a public space, especially after one of the men having shown a weird aggressiveness in his description of the kosher section. I think I was probably the only Jewish person either of them had ever met and the implications of the meat department worker’s speech still make me uneasy.

I’m going to look past this incident and continue to celebrate Chanukkah.

"Bear" Culture & White Gay Hegemony

As I have grow older, I developed more of a body type that is a defining factor for the 'bear' subculture of mainstream Western (American) gay society. I have some issues with this label, especially because I do not identify as a 'bear' nor do I identify with many of the aspects & interests within this gay subculture.

Bear culture may have originally formed as an answer to the vibrant femme presence that most people thought of as "gay". Bears tend to perfer to present as hypermasculine by growing beards, cultivating more muscular or fat heavy bodies, not shaving their body hair (popular in mainstream gay culture), & dressing more "straight" among other things.

The irony of the bear image is that it is very specific, which seems contrary to it's first incarnation as a down-to-earth answer to starving twink bodies and gilded drag queen fabulous. Men are judged as non-bear based on body weight (even too much fat can be non-bear), their facial hair and body hair, among other identifiers.

Another issue with the image of what is "bear" is that generally bears are seen almost exclusively as White men. There have been many incidents of people of color who find bear body types attractive or who identify as bears who were unable to gain access to a certain online community. There is also a large reflection of the "no Blacks, no Asians" trend on profile sites. This echoes the implicit racism in mainstream gay culture as well.

While bears may have originally presented as your average man who happens to desire other men, who is "working class" and "just another one of the guys", this has shifted greatly. Bear culture tends to side with mainstream gay culture which has a backbone in upper middle class capitalism (classism), racism, economic marriage equality (heteronormativity) and body image issues (who gets to define a bear?)

I take issue with this, especially the issues in presenting another White face of the gay community. I also take issue because I do not identify as gay, whereas bear culture is disproportionally full of gay men. Bisexuals, transpeople and people who idenitfy as queer or otherwise may not be as accepted in bear communities.

Even though now I reflect more of a bear-type body, I remember when I tried gaining access to bear culture and community as a thinner man and was denied many times by men I found desirable.

This is why I do not identify as a bear.

The Cloud Atlas: A Problematic Disaster

So the Cloud Atlas...

YELLOWFACE IS NOT OKAY!!
Those were seriously the worst makeup prosthetics I have ever seen in my life. It was totally distracting of the message. Which, by the way, was kind of contradictory. Was it that hard to find some kick-ass Asian actors (Chow-Yun Fat, Tadanobu Asano, John Cho...they're out there!)

Can we please stop using this tired bullshit trope of the White Savior Complex? I understand that all these White 'merrricans are tired of hearing Black folks talk about slavery...well too bad! We should never stop talking about how the backbone of this nation was built on slave labor and continues to perpetuate the issues that arose with it. So you try to ease your White guilt with another example of the nice-white-guy (usually an outsider or an intellectual) saving some poor 'savage' (or better yet, woman of color). So effective.

Also, complete failure to effectively address the Holocaust and why the character of Jocasta might be upset with fraternizing WITH A FUCKING NAZI!

(Perhaps I will write a more intelligible review later. Don't hold your breath.)

Suffering from "-isms" in the classroom?

I've been very busy with starting college again for the first time in two years. It's very challenging, but I have been running into roadblocks I didn't expect to find in academia. As it turns out, my new department is very prescriptivist, which as a linguist, I find very troubling. However, there are even more things making me uncomfortable.

In my speech and language development class, we've been reading a textbook by a professor of speech language pathology (and a PhD) that I have found very troubling. He uses a lot of stereotyped examples when talking about cultural differences in language development (such as, "Asians are more reticent that Americans in speech") and without providing any evidence other than anecdotal items. That is not hard data! Also he uses "middle-class Americans" as a standard, while omitting race from the information unless he want's to differentiate between what he calls "middle-class Americans" and "middle-class African-Americans". I think he needs to incorporate White in his statements and so-called observations, otherwise his categorizations make no sense.

On top of this, I don't feel like my professor really respects my unease or disagreement with the way this author is presenting his information. I don't really know what to do, and I'm a bit tired of being the only dissenter in the class.

Furthermore my professor recently corrected my writing in a paper as not being "people first language", I had written 'deaf infants' where I should have written 'infants who are deaf'...meanwhile the professor allows a sociology major (!) in class use the term homosexual...which is very clinical and not people-first at all! (In case you are wondering, same-sex or gay/lesbian is more appropriate and "people first").

My last point, we were watching different videos of babies practicing a concept called joint attention with various caregivers. All of my classmates ooh-ed and aw-ed over all of the white babies but during a video of a very cute black girl, no one said anything or made any noises at all. I didn't think about this at first, but I was feeling odd and then it was all bit chilling to me upon further reminiscing. What are the implications of this? I'm not sure.

I'm not sure what to do, I feel like a black sheep in my department. This is all new to me, I've never encountered this in academia before. My undergraduate degree program was in a linguistics department that was very forward thinking, pro-feminist, anti-racist and anti-homophobic, very social justice oriented and active in our community. From what I have seen in this department, things are a bit different. I am not sure how to proceed.

More Portland Police Bureau Bullshit

In a SHOCKING (lol) article this week, the Portland Mercury stated that the latest data from the Portland Police Bureau on all traffic stops in 2010 shows that officers pulled over and searched Blacks and Latinos TWICE as much as they did to White Portlanders.

Now the 2010 census reported that Portland is 72.2% White and only 7.8 and 9.4% Black and Latino respectively. Theoretically more White people would be pulled over because of numbers, right?

Even more outrageous numbers in the Mercury article indicate that despite this trend, White Portlanders had a higher percentage (32%) of having contraband than  Latinos (23%) or Blacks (26%).

So what does that say about the PPB that we didn't already know? Despite the bureau's surprising admission that racism is playing a factor, it doesn't sound like they're doing much to curb it.

(Ed. note: You can read the full article here.)

Israeli Hypocrisy and the Immigrant Experience

So, there was a story about an immigration crackdown in a mostly African immigrant neighbourhood in Tel Aviv this past week. I’ve sat on this news for a while mostly because I was too chickenshit to say anything about it and also because it depresses me. Last night my friend (who is also half Moroccan Jew like me) told me a story about how his mother, growing up in Israel, would eat apple cores out of trashcans because she was hungry and her family too poor to afford proper meals. I was incensed and felt the call to write something

In the United States, we Americanized Jews are fed this idea of Israel as this egalitarian safe space where all are welcome and we are with our “people”. The irony is this is wholly untrue, especially for those who are not European Jews or residents of Israel who are from Africa such as refugees, migrant workers and other similar groups.  I remember a story especially, back in 2010 where Ashkenazim (European Jews) didn’t want their children studying with Sephardim (North-African, Middle Eastern, Arab, Persian Jews etc) and were taking their kids out of schools. Segregation is illegal in Israel.

Recently, the anti-African hatred in Israel has grown to disgusting proportions and really highlights a gigantic disconnect between rich European Jews and their poor African neighbours while mirroring the Sephardic/Mizrahi experience in Israel for generations (though perhaps not to the extreme of current oppression): There have been numerous race riots where Africans are targeted, the police have been racially profiling migrant workers, Israel is building a detention centre for African migrants, sex-trafficking victims from Sudan and Ethiopia were put in a jail because shelter space was limited, but perhaps most chilling was the cheering of police as they hunted down Sudanese on the streets of Eliat.

I am the child of generations of Iberian-Sephardic Jews who made their home in Morocco after the racist Catholic monarchy expelled them in 1492 (same year they started conquering the “New” World, by the way). I am the child of Moroccans that survived the Holocaust because the King of Morocco refused to bow to the colonial Vichy regime’s Nazi policies. I was not born to sit here and be quiet while injustice is meted out by a powerful few.  A writer for Haaretz, Sarah Kreimer put it well: “What would my grandfather say about migrant workers? We owe it to ourselves – as a society that understands what it means to be refugees – to treat them with basic human decency and respect.”

What is happening in Israel right now is wrong, very wrong. It is contrary to the teachings of our people. Palestinians are being pushed out of their homes and murdered in the streets, African refugees are being treated like criminals, land is being occupied, bombs are blowing up Jewish children in the name of G-d, drones and missiles are ripping apart communities. It must stop. I am only one voice, but I am raising it up.

I dedicate this article to my grandmother.

Sharon Needles and (Racist) White Gay Hegemony

So, it came to my attention in this week's Willamette Weekly that Sharon Needles (a.k.a. Aaron Coady) of RuPaul's Drag Race is going to be in Portland.

Fun Facts About Sharon Needles:  

Sharon Needles has worn a swastika t-shirt.


Sharon Needles has worn a Confederate flag one-piece swimsuit.


Sharon Needles has used the N-WORD onstage. (Courtesy of Queerty)

Oh and did I mention the bitch be Aryan as hell?

Not only that but WW's interview spot called the Hotseat in the "Culture" section interviewed Sharon. What I found rather hilarious is that despite this column's name, Aaron Spencer (the interviewer) did not ask any difficult questions of Sharon. In fact he didn't touch any of the controversy surrounding Needles, who has been accused of being not only racist but also transphobic and classist. I noticed also during RuPaul's Drag Race (shut up!) that Needles wore many controversial tee-shirts, two supporting Republican politicians and one even being a confederate flag, which the producers apparently made her cover up later in the episode. In a video after the series finished, Needles is quoted as saying: 

The other night me and a couple of my friends went out to have a good time, and there's this young thing. I call her a "thing" because, you know, I don't know how to tip-toe around gender rules or queer politics. I'm 30 years old, rich, and famous; I don't have to deal with that shit anymore, you know what I mean? So we'll just call them "him"/"her"/"thing," whatever. And you know she really finds my shows offensive. ... So anyway she got upset that I paint myself brown, that I would use language that she found offensive. ... She made me an unnecessary poster child for post-racial change."

SIDE EYE FOREVER! As if we're post-racial...ha!

Also Needles posted this on her Facebook:

“i fucked a black last week…call me a cheater, not a racists..i don’t say n-word..i say n****r..thats the word..i’m not afraid of language..and i’m not afraid to say red lipstick is not your color..and i’m not afraid to say that i hate when people post pictures of them self eating..beans for that matter!! but the baby picture is super cute!!" (Full story here)

Yeah, so there was that.

To me, Sharon Needles reflects a huge disconnect of the gay White (male) mainstream and queer people of color, poor queer people, lesbians, disabled queers, fat people and transfolk. We are constantly barraged with images of skinny White "twink" men and Needles does a huge disservice to the community as a whole when she uses her privilege for evil. Sorry guys, racism and transphobia is evil. No other word for it. I don't want this bitch coming to my city, but I gotta remember she's playing to the White Gay Hegemony and that's just the way it is. Then again, I also remember reading somewhere that Lady Gaga is a fan. So fuck you, Sharon Needles.

No love.

UPDATE: The Ron Frashour Case

So, according to the Oregonian, lawyers for the city of Portland are arguing that the reinstatement of Ron Frashour, a Portland police officer fired in 2010 for using excessive force on an unarmed black man, Aaron Campbell, who then died from his injuries, would violate many statutes. These include but are not limited to violation of the city charter, the state constitution and also the national constitution. I am very pleased with this news and I hope that the city can continue holding up its decision to fire Frashour. He does not deserve to be reinstated. 


This would be an amazing step towards justice in our city because Portland has had a history of reinstating racist killer cops after they are removed from service. This would be the first time an arbitrators reinstatement decision is ignored and fought. 


For example: In 2009, Portland police officer Christopher Humphreys shot an unarmed 12-year old black girl with a shotgun at close range, on her own doorstep. He was suspended by the city commissioner but later reinstated after the Portland Police Association staged a rally and announced a no-confidence vote taken against the city commissioner and the chief of police.

In 2005, Portland police officer Scott McCollister shot Kendra James, a 21 year old black female and left her handcuffed and bleeding on the street to die. An all White jury found McCollister not guilty of excessive force and he was reinstated after arbitration. 


These are just a few examples of why our police force is out of control and needs to be stopped. They have a history of killing unarmed people of color or people with documented mental disorders and disabilities. And they get away with it.






(Ed. note: Thanks to the Portland Independent Media Center organization for continued vigilance and information on the history of Portland's racist killer cops.)

A Manifesto of Validation of My Self

Sometimes I feel like I don’t fit in anywhere. I’m too White-looking or middle-class for brown folk, but I’m too queer/brown/Political/supersites for Whiteys. I guess that’s the fallacy of thinking you’re special in America.

Scratch that. I don’t know why I am so into navel gazing lately…it’s like I think I am saying something profound. To be completely honest, it ain’t really profound to anyone except to me. I used to dream about making this stupid blog into something amazing, changing peoples minds and shit…pero en el fondo I don’t really know if I am even touching anyone.

So here’s my manifesto, for me, inspired by Zac Slams.

A Manifesto of Validation of My Self

1.     My ethno-racial/sexual/gender identity is on my terms, not yours. I choose to identify myself a certain way so as not to be blotted out by heterosexism, racism, classism, regionalism and other interlocking systems of oppression.

I do not need to explain myself to you. Ever. I will embrace my Otherness and use it as a tool for my protection, validation and revolution.

2.     Si yo elija hablar en español y tu no entiendes, eso no vale nada. El español es el lenguaje de mi corazón, de mi alma. No me importa un carajo si tu no entiendas lo que digo, ademas probablamente no quieres escucharlo. That is no excuse, however, for racism.

3.     I have the right to say/express what I think/see/feel. My opinions, whether they are right or not, are just as valid and important as yours. I have the right to be heard, despite our society’s attempt at quelling those of us that speak out.

4.     I choose to live. I have a right to life. I will not let myself be co-opted/colonized/erased/assaulted/raped/molested/attacked ever again and I will defend my body and my self with force if necessary.

Brown (a poem)

They say to me,

“You’re not really brown, you know.”

Or,  “I thought you were White.” and

“Oh, well you don’t look

(insert: Latino, Spanish, Jewish, Arab, Middle-Eastern, BROWN.)

I know what my skin looks like:

café au lait, with too much lait

Brown isn’t a skin colour,

Brown is an experience

Brown is being told

To speak English

Brown is being called a terrorist on the train

When someone confuses your yarmulke with a kufi

Brown is people mispronouncing your name

Every fucking day

Brown is being afraid security is gonna be called

 When you’re browsing the aisles

Brown is being told to go back to where you came from,

When your apartment is just a block away

Brown is being assaulted in public,

With everybody watching

Brown is being scared of walking alone at night,

Of airports, the police, your own neighbours

Brown is being told

Your experience doesn’t matter

Brown is an experience.

I am brown.

Driving Miss Gaga

"Are Latinos supposed to be grateful that a white superstar, born of privilege, included a racist shout out to our community? Not all Latino ladies are 'cholas' in the barrio, some of them are teachers, writers, engineers and nurses and doctors." -- Robert Paul Reyes

A while back I wrote an article praising the Estonian technopop artist Kerli Kõiv because she represents what I think a true musician should be: modest, compassionate and real. For juxtaposition I am going to talk about Stefani Germanotta better known as Lady Gaga.

I have remained silent for the most part in my dislike of Lady Gaga. I am not a fan of attention-seeking stunts or high fashionistas. I am especially not into mainstream American pop music and Lady Gaga is arguably mainstream.

My real beef with her though, is her privilege. She is from a wealthy background (she used to party with Paris Hilton), she is conventionally attractive, and she is cisgendered, White and skinny. Her inability to accept any of this is troubling.

Somehow there was some kind of rumor that Lady Gaga came from a poor background and that she made herself from nothing, this is patently untrue. In her wikipedia article she is quoted as having said that her family came from modest means and that her parents worked for everything. Her private school upbringing and matriculation to the exclusive Tisch School of the Arts at NYU say otherwise. I have heard the argument before, about parents working hard. My parents worked hard, my dad put himself through medical school on scholarships and crappy cleric positions, but that doesn't mean my sister and I grew up with little means. I have no problem accepting and deconstructing my class privilege.

Another issue with Gaga's privilege is her racism. People hailed her single "Born This Way" as the newest "gay anthem". Hold up, what? I gotta wonder, have these people even read the lyrics: "YOU'RE BLACK, WHITE, BEIGE, CHOLA DESCENT

YOU'RE LEBANESE, YOU'RE ORIENT".

Excuse me, but that is racist. It is tacitly agreed that using the word "Oriental" is about the same as using the word "Negro" and wholly inappropriate. Political correct-ness aside, this was a stupid word to use in a song dubbed progressive. Orientals are rugs, not people. (Ed. I understand that she didn't use the word "Oriental" precisely but she did truncate the word to fit her rhyme, she refers to races in this line so arguably the word "orient" was referring to "Oriental" or Asian. So STFU.)

Furthermore, the word "chola" is problematic too. The term was originally used as a designation for people of mixed or pure Amerindian descent in the racist classification system of colonial Latin America. The word presently has come to refer to "low income Mexican-American families in the United States" or "Latino gangsters". (see Wikipedia article here). Miguel Perez, of Chicanos Unidos further elucidates in this article. Basically, Gaga is relegating all Latinos to this designation of poor and criminal.

Also, what is this beige bullshit? I guess that's my category.

I just want people to see Lady Gaga for who she is. She is not "weird" or unattractive, that is her makeup and clothing. She is skinny, she is White and she dresses as our society prescribes for her biological gender. What is special about 

that?

It's easy to be angry with all of this, but in the end it's like my boyfriend said this morning,“When we're talking about Lady Gaga and Madonna, we’re not talking about women; we’re talking about clothes and makeup.”

(Ed. note: Also, see Lady Gaga's "Little Monster" fans respond to Miguel Perez's article Warning! Very triggering.)

Personal Space: The Grocery Store is Not a Country Club

My friend S. recently told me a disturbing story. This is nothing new to me, but it was one of the first times he had experienced racism in Portland due to his experience. So you know, S. is half Moroccan like me, but he has darker skin than I do.

S. is health-concious and prefers shopping for his food at places like Whole Foods, New Seasons etc. He was in NW Portland's Whole Foods (located on the skirts of the Pearl District) last Sunday to do some shopping but he had to use the bathroom. Whole Foods has a customer only policy on bathrooms, and S. for all intents and purposes was a customer. He did not have the entry code on a receipt though, because he wasn't finished shopping. This is where the trouble started. S. waited while the bathroom was occupied and then tried to enter after an older White man came out. The man tried to stop S. from going in, demanding to see his receipt and when S. didn't answer him the man started calling for security. S. theorized to me that his skin color and his reticence (and possibly his attire) led the man to believe he didn't speak English nor was a customer of the store. It was humiliating and afterwards S. went to the manager and told him what happened. Fortunately the manager was sympathetic. Unfortunately there is nothing he can do about. Nor will it be the last time something like this happens.

I have had many experiences like S.'s and sadly I was not surprised by his story. I was disgusted, of course, and also saddened that he had to experience this. S. comes from a more multicultural/multiethnic community in Pennsylvania and I don't think he has had to confront other people perceiving him as an "Other" before.

I found myself thinking more about this incident and then about two days later I had an epiphany. Rich (and/or) White people constantly feel entitled to question the presence of people like us in a space that they perceive as "theirs". The neighborhood in which this particular grocery is located is demographically-speaking, overwhelmingly White and furthermore the Whole Foods brand attracts mostly wealthy White customers.

What I don't understand is why the customer decided to intervene. It really wasn't any of his business. That is what Whole Foods employs security guards for. Moreover, S. was carrying a Whole Foods bag, so theoretically he was also a customer. This man decided that my friend did not belong in his space, his neighborhood and felt threatened. Why do White people feel they can question this? The rest of us are certainly made to feel that we can't question gentrification, be it in our working class neighborhoods, our gay bars or our religious community centers.

The grocery store is not a country club.

I want JUSTICE

I want justice for victims of racial violence. The world has gone mad. It is disgusting. 

Everyone has been talking about the Trayvon Martin (learn about it here) case...frankly I am glad it is getting so much press. It has brought up a lot of strong feelings in my community here and I want to touch on how it relates to the injustice of the system here in Portland.

It's been about a month since the shooting of Trayvon Martin, and on March 13th a local Latino man (link: Alberto Flores-Haro) was shot in the stomach by our notorious police force when he came out into his yard to check for intruders late in the evening.

On top of that, I discovered today that the Portland Police Bureau is considering reinstating Ron Frashour (AFTER HE WAS FIRED!), the officer who shot a mentally-unstable, unarmed Black man in the back with an assault rifle (Jason Campbell) last January. An arbitrator for the case states that "it was reasonable to believe that he could be armed" (Portland Mercury, 2012). What was the justification for this? Was it reasonable because he was Black and upset? The record states that it "appeared" he was reaching for a gun as he ran away but many local citizens are unsatisfied by that idea. I am one of them.

The Trayvon Martin case stirs up a lot of feelings for those of us living here in Portland because of the nature of the crime: An unarmed young Black man being shot to death. The Portland Police Bureau has a sordid history (google Portland Copwatch) of shooting unarmed homeless, disabled and/or people of color. With the possible reinstating of Frashour,it appears that we cannot control the police and we have no voice for justice in our city.

Is there justice anywhere?

Speaking up, speaking out

Lately I am running out of things to say, it seems. I have been harping on the same subjects over and over and to what end? There have been myriad encounters and stories like my previous post here in this city. It's something that doesn't seem like to change. I want to challenge people to think outside their privilege and see the reality of our society but at the same time I am having issues getting past the anger I feel when I am being discriminated against. 


I'm tired of being told that I'm demasiado intenso, that I just need to have a positive outlook, that I shouldn't be so mean. Most of the people telling me this are my White friends. It probably doesn't help that most of my friends here are White...but what do you expect? My cousin Armenia, on the contrary, reinforces me against giving in to complacency. She thinks it is a positive trait that I am so outspoken and that I will confront people who are being racist/homophobic/classist/sexist etc. 


I guess the issue is that I need to find some happy medium without giving up the fight. I think maybe that I don't have to be so combative, but I also don't have to stay silent.