Mostrando entradas con la etiqueta sociology. Mostrar todas las entradas
Mostrando entradas con la etiqueta sociology. Mostrar todas las entradas

2011-10-22

Under the Table (a Tale of S. W. B.)


I don’t like screaming the r word, I really don’t. I like giving people the benefit of the doubt, I swear! I don’t want to be seen as the Cassandra that is cursed so that no one listens to her warnings.  I understand that people get tired of talking about it…but that’s complacency you know. It is just an excuse for complacency.

Anyway, I was downtown last afternoon, more specifically in the Pearl District (see: Gentrification Vs. Development) waiting for an interview at an art college when I decided to kill some time while I waited by going into Sur La Table. This place is a hoity-toity kitchenware store right across from Powell’s books, catering mostly to upper-echelon foodies and culinary hobbyists. They even have cooking classes.  There only other location in the area is in Lake Oswego.  Should have been my first warning, right? Mistake No.1.
Whatever. I’m dumb like that.

I walked in and was immediately but passively accosted by the phenomenon I (not so) fondly refer to as “Shopping While Black”, or SWB. This is related to the phenomenon known as Driving While Black. Basically, when one walks into a “finer” shopping establishment and does not fit the nice-rich-White- lady/gentleman stereotype, one is subject to this phenomenon. It can manifest as employees following you around the store, being overeager to direct you to a particular section of the store (clearance, for instance), positioning themselves between you and the exit or even telling you that they don’t carry “those kinds of items here.” Yeah, I’ve heard that before too. 

So at Sur La Table, the second I walk in, a blonde NWL comes right up to me to ask if I can be helped with anything. Normally I just say no, but this time I asked about frying pans (Mistake No. 2) and she directed me to said section, and explicitly pointed out the two-for-one deal. As if. She hovers a bit, till finally I kindly and passively let her know that I’m just browsing and she can fuck of somewhere else. I’ve already been subjected to two examples of SWB, but then I notice immediately that she wanders away to the end of the display case-created “hall” where she positions herself in the way of main exit, pretending not to be watching me. Right. Like I don’t know what she’s doing. Loss prevention my ass.

At this point I am pissed off and definitely not going to buy their overpriced Scandinavian cookware. I walk around from the pans, wipe my hands on a few baking trays out of spite and then continue around to the main exit so as to not walk by this NWL. She, of course, pops out from her completely obvious station as Guarder Against the Poor in Our Store (did that make you chuckle?) and wishes me a nice day.

I didn’t even look at her. Bitch.

Normally I get over occurrences of SWB after a few hours and a few cigarettes. I woke up however, a day later, still pissed off. I ranted on the phone to my mother about it, who has resigned herself already to the fact that this isn’t ever going to change. She suggested dressing up super nice and just trying to interact with the same employee to teach her a lesson. I, in turn, wanted to call up rant at the manager, lie and say that I was a relative of Ina Garten (the Barefoot Contessa) because, 1) being half-Jewish I decided that we were related and 2) that she would never support Sur La Table again after I related this experience to her. 

In the end, this being untrue and probably unhelpful to my blood pressure and karmic state, I decided to just give them a nasty YELP review and write this blog.
The End.

2011-09-06

Slam this (My Bliss)


Who the fuck am I?

I don’t know who I am anymore, this pale ugly stranger
Beady eyes inflamed with a fire nothing can quench
My thirst is eternal like the g-ddamn sun that
Doesn’t boil my fallow skin to beautiful brown like
Days past with seagulls, pelicans and tropical terns flying LOW the planes, the planes are getting closer everyday driving me mad like a horsefly ramming itself against unyielding greasy glass SHATTERING all over the wall after I throw the bottle in a fit of childish yet adult frenzy, FRIENDS where are you other than slipping away and I can’t remember how your voice sounds anymore its been so long yet only as if it were yesterday why haven’t you called I changed my number make a fucking effort because I am worth a damn

DAMN.
I am worth a damn so why do I leave them to rape me everyday?

I am losing my face speaking without accents not speaking in tongues you can understand, you sientes lo que digo? my people where are my people you are NOT my people who the fuck are my people? My people wouldn’t rape me, hate me, snub me, and cut me down to size WHAT the hell is this hi how are you HOW can I transfer your CALL my mother to explain but I can’t speak she don’t get it anymore ANYWAY my throat is caught in they dicks as they…      
Again and again and again.

Again when, when will I be beautiful inside? He reminds me to live instead of die.
I’ve been dying since I turned fifteen, turning green and rotting away from the soul but this boy he gave me my goal to be alive to stay afloat because g-d knows its easier to choke.

So choke on this.            
Choke on my bliss.
Damn.
I am worth a damn.
Yes,
M’am.

How can I help you today?

2011-08-28

A small pleasure

A few weeks ago near the end of July, I had a great interaction over text-message with a complete stranger. It's little moments like these that really make my day and give back a modicum of my faith in humankind.


The conversation goes as follows:
-"I don't know if you'll get this but would like to give you a chance to see sarah before she goes. My place sun /731-2pm or come for informal lunch on mon 8/1?"
-"Is this megan?"
-"Sorry. It's savannah. Is this heather?"
-"No sorry you have the wrong number. I am a dude."
-"Sorry. Have a good weekend!"
-"No worries! You too!"
-"Thanks :)"

2011-08-17

Super-powers would probably actually suck


Have you ever had one of those days when you wished you had super-powers? Mine would either be telekinesis or control over elements. Lindsey and I already joke that we can see into other people's souls. Not that it's really a joke though...we can. The problem with these hypothetical super-powers is that we, as partial and emotional beings would be unable to control them. I know that myself especially. How many times have we wished as children (and even adults) that we had the ability to magickally destroy, change or affect something?

This also comes at a time when I've begun to read Leslie Marmon Silko's Almanac of the Dead again. It's one of those books that makes White people sick. No wonder it wasn't as wildly popular as her first book, Ceremony. (In fact it was highly criticized. I wonder how many of her original readers were White? But that's another story...) Silko describes the main character's meeting with a Yupik (Eskimo) woman who can create electromagnetic energy surges to bring planes down with sheer will. Wouldn't that be awesome/dangerous? When reading this section, it made me a little excited but also a little sick.

I know that if I could, I would retaliate against those people with bad souls who try to hurt others. I would probably get carried away. I find that within myself are the seeds of destruction sometimes. However I try to remember that within that destruction comes rebirth.

Besides, if we were meant to have such incredible powers we would have already evolved with them. Or whatever.

If you could have any 'super-power', what would it be? Would you be able to control it/yourself?


(photo copywrited to Comics Alliance - thanks y'all!)